18.9.2007

It has been a fortnight since the mother loitering about our garden with her only child had been ruthlessly killed.Yes I know when I shall reveal that mother was not a human being but was from an ignored canine race, my sentiments for the dog will be subjected to a ridicule by many of you who are insensitive themselves towards animals and for whom being emotional for dogs,cats or any other insignificant life according to their lexicon is an exaggeration of sentimental expression.That might be the reason why it has been possible for a mob to exert all their strength in killing a sick dog which might have been cured had it been taken to a doctor.We remain mute onlookers when we see a conductor kicking a helpless lady out of the bus.We dont react even when we see reckless bus drivers roaming scot free even after mowing down many under their killing wheels.Our stoicism is exhibited in many occasions of our witnessing such criminal activities silently.But our imminent danger only came from a dog which bit a few losing its mind in the dogs' months (mating season) and we reacted quite vigorously by killing it off.Probably we could kill it because it was a hapless,defenceless dog which couldnot combat for its life with us.
My poem is dedicated to that stray dog which grew on streets and which took shelter in our garden for last two years of its life.

A Petty thing

Motionless she lay there in the dust.
Her mouth open and stained,
Eyes blank,showing signs of pain
Bruised body bore imprints of torture ,
As if she was battered
Till her breath lasts.

There she lay lifeless amid the maddening crowd.
Crowd ecstatic at her fall,
Crowd that took charge in her lynch.
She was mad after all,
She had to be killed.

Her life had no value as ours have
She was an orphan after all
She had to be killed.
She was not taken to a doctor,
She was not taken for cure.
She was just washed off this earth,
She being a filthy piece of dirt
Fell prey to our wrath.

We inhumans remain at large
Even after all bloodbaths
Triggered in the name of religion,community.
And only she had to be killed
for she was violent,lunatic,
not worth a life amidst humanity.
She was a petty bitch after all
She had to be killed.

Ashmita

DAWN

Meeting you was an experience
I would nourish,
Being with you was a gift
I would cherish.
Talking to you was a delight
I miss everyday,
Laughing with you was a joy
I could never repay.
Crying with you was sane,
Crying for you was a pain,
Cried by you was a bane.

But still living with the fragments
You left me with.
Fragments of love,trust
begot the entirety of distrust.
Fragments of mind and heart
tried to pull me apart.
But still living with the lesson
you taught me at the end
that selfishness is just
when it comes to some gain.

I'm happy in a way
Happy for I got a new life
with the person I might
not love the way I did you;
But the amount of love
now I receive
being thousand times more
than you could ever give
makes up for all my mental blues.

Still looking out of the window
when I behold the weary sky,
I feel my life would have been no much better
had you been in my life.
Now I'm gonna live my dream
I dreamt with you,
with someone else;
But I'm happy in way
For the person in my life now
is there to stay.

I'll set upon a new voyage,Soon.
With new hope,new joy
But with no new dreams anymore.
Nothing hurts more than the dreams
scattered about in shreds on the floor.
I wish to sail on this voyage in God's name
I wish to hear Him say 'Amen'.

Ashmita.

Diary/2.2.2007

At last I finished perusing 'My Feudal Lord'.I like the way Tehmina struggled herself out of the domination of a sadist monster and evolved into a steadfast forthright rebellious person who dared bare her personal life infront of all breaking the convention of silence.She admitted the wrongs she did on others and she also revealed the wrong done on her.Days after days the woman who tolerated being battered savagely by her husband at the smallest reasons atlast mustered enough courage and determination to retort sharp replies on her husband's face and rebelled against him.It was a mammoth transformation for a woman who grew up feeling insecure and unwanted always and whose childhood days were mostly spent in making attempts to gain love and approval for her actions from her domineering mother.It was shocking that her parents were fully supportive towards her spoilt youngest sister Adila who indulged herself in adultery with none other than her own brother in law i.e Tehmina's philandering husband and broke her marriage.But they didnt give a helping hand towards Tehmina.Instead they disowned her severing all ties with her especially after her autobiography came into market.How can parents be so biased and partial in treatment of their own children?We think that we sould do whatever our parents say because they can never think ill for our future but aren't there such parents like Tehmina's who are more concerned for their social status than to succor their helpless children? They force their daughters into continuing a bad marriage taking away all supports from her.Is a daughter just a burden on her parents' shoulder which they want to get rid of somehow ? Many parents possess this notion that after giving marriage to their daughters they hold no further responsibilty towards her.It's her sole responsibility to sustain the marriage even if it sucks her life into an unfathomable well of mental anguish.Parents also have their favourite children whom they are very biased of and in order to administer partial treatment to their favourite wards they do injustice to the rest.In some families the discrimination between a boy child and girl child is so immense that the parents' discriminating mentalilty cripples the neglected and oppressed child's mental growth.They grow up feeling confused and develop over a period of time a huge inferiority complex.They suffer from a lack of confidence and self-esteem which hinders the growth of their personality.

Diary/8.1.2007

As if it was not enough to make us suffer a season of five bandhs in last 22 days last year that at the dawn of this year too we are slapped with another bandh of 24 hours.I wonder if the political parties get their desired results out of these frequently summoning of strikes.Strikes should be used as a weapon of last resort but strikes are losing the power of its message through such inconsiderate,rampant misuse of it.They are also disrupting the normal course of human lives thereby exciting a feeling of exasperation in common people.The majority don't support strike but it is being imposed on us forcing us to pass a day idly.The protesting parties dont think of the inconvenience suffered by common mass.Thousands of people are there who earn their square meals through a day's hardwork.Strikes steal their right to earn.If a person falls seriously ill during strike,his family members face several impediments to administer him proper medical care.Does any protesting party or the ruling government think for once of these inconveniences? They don't.Today I didnt go to school taking a peril on my life.If the bus I travel in is bombcharged and I lose my limbs then neither government nor any party will come to see me.So it's better that I sacrifice my CLs instead of endangering my life.But truly I'm feeling sick of these strikes now.Time is ripe enough for the political powers to be conscious of what the common people want and I think someday we common onlookers and silent sufferers of this bane should call strike to say no to strike.